Tis the season again, folks. Seems like it starts increasingly earlier every year. The Halloween decorations come down the same day the Christmas lights go up—and Thanksgiving is thrown in the middle. Sounds like a recipe for stress, doesn’t it?
While the holidays can cause anxiety for so many of us, it’s important at this time of year to rise above the fray and take time for self-care. Remember that you can’t fill other people’s wells if yours is empty. The reason for the season is all about joy, celebration, and love—including self-love.
What does self-care look like when your holiday to-do list keeps getting longer? Here are a few suggestions:
Stop.
Take a minute to breathe, look around you, recognize the beauty in your life, and be grateful for what you have.
Scientific studies have shown that gratitude actually leads to happiness, and there’s no better time to be thankful than the holiday season. There is ALWAYS something to be grateful for, no matter what you’re experiencing. Find it and think about it. When you acknowledge grateful feelings, they become more real, and they grow.
Also, spending a moment or two taking slow, deep breaths changes your brain chemistry so you are calmer and better equipped to handle holiday demands. Here’s a brief breathing exercise that will help steady you:
Think of a word or short phrase that represents the state you want to be in (peace, calm, clarity, grounded, centered, etc.).
Close your eyes.
Taking a slow inhale, pay attention to your breath. Picture it slowly filling your lungs.
Taking a slow exhale, think of our word or phrase.
Repeat as needed or desired.
As you focus on the positive, your heart becomes lighter and happier. Suddenly, you’re not so worried about your to-do list. Maybe you lay it aside for a half hour and go play you’re your child or your dog. Maybe you tackle the list with gusto, buoyed by these positive feelings. Or maybe you just realize you don’t have to take everything so seriously.
2. Say no, occasionally.
Despite beliefs to the contrary, you don’t have to shoulder every responsibility thrown at you—or attend every party to which you’re invited. The holidays are hectic enough without thinking you’re obligated to cram every activity imaginable into eight weeks.
This time of year, it’s easy to feel out of control because your life can be dictated by outside forces (including other people’s schedules, needs and desires). When you give yourself permission to say no, you’re putting control back into your own hands, which relieves a lot of the pressure you may be feeling to “do it all.”
A great way to say “no” without using that word is, “Thank you, but I’m going to pass this time.” You can offer to do something else instead, revisit the subject later, or leave it at that, depending on your comfort level.
Say “no” to a friend’s cocktail party—and plan to get together with that friend in January instead. Say “no” to running the Christmas charity event—and volunteer for something that you’re passionate about in the spring. Keep in mind that there is life after the holidays for you to live and enjoy.
3. Connect to your spiritual side.
Whether or not you are observant or religious, the holidays allow us to access our spirituality more readily. The last month of the year does contain some of the most beloved religious holidays many of us have celebrated our whole lives in some form.
Even if you don’t celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, or Kwanzaa, you can use this time to connect with a divine higher power that is larger than you can comprehend. There is something very soothing about this. It creates a sense that there is a larger purpose to our existence than the day-to-day grind, and that can alleviate concerns and worries both large and small.
To that end, you can go to a church or synagogue service, take a long walk and contemplate the certainty of day and night, or simply sit in your backyard and watch the stars come out. However you choose to connect to your spiritual side, your stress level is guaranteed to drop.
4. Move.
Not your home—your body. Movement is one of the key rejuvenators to which we can always turn.
Your body may be craving movement more during the holidays since it’s a wonderful way to raise your endorphins and reduce cortisol levels.
In addition to whatever form of exercise you like, simple movements like head rolls, shoulder stretches, and wishbones can produce similar good feelings and relieve the stress that builds up in the body at holiday time.
Check out our website for more about incorporating movement into your daily routine.